AV   omg crabcakes look

AV   theyre hereeeee theyre finally here B:D

Avril jogs over with arms open, immediately going in for a hug. Jenny's smile narrows, but she reluctantly accepts it anyway. You casually stand off to the side, glancing over at the resident lifeguard.

EW   Crabcakes? That's new.

EW   You don't mind if I take it for a spin, right?

CT   I WILL FLAY YOU ALIVE IF YOU REFER TO ME IN ANY WAY.

EW   Ehee hee. So that includes your name, too?

CT   JUST GIVE ME A REASON.

EW   No fair. I've gotta address you somehow.

CT   THE ONLY THING YOU'VE 'GOTTA' DO IS GET A D*MN JOB FOR ONCE.

CT   WASTE OF F*CKING AIR.

EW   Eww! Jenny! Did you hear him?

CT   SHE KNOWS MORE THAN ANYONE. SHE'S THE ONE STUCK WITH YOU.

JN   Oh for Spryns sake...

With a body still stuck to her like an octopus, your sister gives the two of you an exasperated glare.

JN   Were here on vacation. Not to stir up unnecessary fights.

JN   Can you guys have some civility for once?

AV   yea crabby make luv not war B)

CT   I THINK YOU'RE MAKING ENOUGH LOVE FOR ALL OF US.

AV   B)

JN   Actually Avril he kind of has a point.

JN   I was all for friendly greetings but hugs dont last this long.

AV   im makin up 4 lost time

AV   u want 1 too el?

EW   I'm good. Wouldn't want to break your concentration on Juney.

JN   Please do. Im starting to smell like sea salt.

As Jenny tries to pry her off, you turn your gaze to the environment. You're not a swimmer, nor are you much for large crowds of families prancing around in their skivvies. But there's a certain wildness about a sunny day on a beach. With stern-looking guardians keeping it all together.

Now that you think about it, he's out of his uniform for once. Instead of blaring red, he's draped in his usual jacket. He could pass for a tourist.

EW   Seems like we're not the only ones on break.

EW   You got the day off and everything?

CT   A GODD*MN MIRACLE, I KNOW.

CT   BUT IF I KNEW JENNY WAS BRINGING ALONG YOUR PUNK-*SS -

EW   What? What would've you done, really?

CT   YOU WANT TO FIND OUT?

He snarls and gets closer. Your grin widens.

EW   I do!

EW   Thanks for asking. You can be pretty considerate sometimes, Crabcakes ~

He goes for a swing. With your superior dexterity, you're able to leap out of the way so the only thing you feel is the whiff of air. You laugh as you land, feeling newfound adrenaline coursing through your veins.

EW   Aren't lifeguards supposed to break up fights?

CT   YOU'RE ON MY TURF, YOU LITTLE SH*T.

You eye the sands and find exactly what you're looking for. You pick up a nice, hefty stick and point it at him.

EW   En garde!

He always goes for big hits. When they land, they knock the breath right out of you. But they're slow, and you're much, much quicker. Every time you dodge, you use his recovery time to take a stab. Your attacks aren't anything compared to a proper punch, but they get him riled up. Like you're a fly constantly buzzing around his ears.

After you get some shots in, he manages to grab the stick and snap it in two.

EW   Uh oh.

You can practically see the smoke coming out of that raging bull's nostrils as he approaches you. Looking around for assistance, you spot a flock of seagulls feasting on some poor fool's discarded lunch. If you can remember the language correctly...

EW   <Friends! Over here!>

EW   <This big guy - uh, enemy? Villain?>

EW   (Ah, crap, birds always have the most complicated accents...)

Ceto and the birds give you the same expression - confusion. You point at the big guy.

EW   <Fries in his pockets!>

Immediately, the gulls zoom over to him, squawking with rapturous fervor. You can see his eyes widen as he puts his arms over his face.

CT   OH F*CK NO.

He sprints away, over to your friends. They hear the commotion and look over.

JN   What the -

AV   the galahz wanna hang out! B:D

He dashes behind Avril and lifts her up in front of him as if she were an umbrella. Jenny shrieks and ducks behind the both of them as the birds descend and... stop.

EW   Huh?

They simply land on her. Like pigeons do at the park on those ladies with the breadcrumbs. Her laugh rumbles out from underneath.

AV   hi babez B)

You stare as he places her down, the seagulls seemingly forgetting your command and opting to roost instead. Then, he marches over to you, making you feel a pinch of true fear.

EW   Ehee hee, that was weird, huh?

EW   Who knew they'd like her that much? You think she knows them?

CT   YOU TOLD THEM SOME SH*T.

EW   Sure did! If you ever want pointers, I can always sit down and -

He kicks sand in your face. You sputter and gape at him.

EW   Wow! Really?

EW   That was low!!

CT   SO NOW WE'RE EVEN.

Then, with little hurrah, he plops down onto the ground. You can only stand there as he catches his breath and uses his shirt to wipe up his sweat.

EW   You're... giving up?

CT   BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I WAS BUSY WITH SH*T BEFORE DEALING WITH YOU.

CT   I'M TAKING A BREATHER.

EW   Huh.

You sit down cross-legged where you are, too, brushing the rest of the sand off of you.

EW   I thought you had the day off.

CT   YEAH, WELL, SOME PEOPLE DON'T ABIDE BY SCHEDULES.

CT   AND IF THEY DROP BY, YOU TAKE CARE OF IT THERE AND THEN.

CT   I'M SURE YOU'RE FAMILIAR WITH THAT CONCEPT.

EW   Eheh, yeah.

EW   So you're saying you were graced by a similarly awesome presence?

CT   AWE AT THE AUDACITY, MAYBE.

At some point, Jenny and Avril (the gulls must've gotten bored and returned to scavenging) made their way over. Ceto grunts as Avril lays down on his legs, while Jenny stays standing. She's always grumbled about finding sand in her pockets weeks later a beach visit.

EW   Next time they come, send them my way.

EW   Anyone who manages to tire you out is a valuable ally of mine.

CT   HA.

EW   What? What's so funny?

He just keeps shaking his head. You look down at Avril, who's been listening with an oddly placid look on her face.

EW   Av? What's he laughing for?

AV   aww dont worry bout it wyn

AV   its just uh

AV   family stuff

EW   Family?

You've been to all sorts of places. And you would've spotted a Portokalos from a mile away. You look at Jenny for further explanation, just to see her mouth narrow into a thin line.

EW   Am I the only one out of the loop, here?

EW   Aww. No fair.

JN   Youre the one always taunting him Wynnie.

EW   It's all for play! It's part of our routine!

EW   Right, Captain?

CT   GO F*CK YOURSELF.

EW   See? He loves it. He loves me.

EW   And I should know if he's got folks, like anyone else!

He scoffs and mutters something under his breath. Avril pats him on the thigh. Then, all you can hear are the commotion around you and the crashing waves. You're left confused and uncomfortable. The mood is so... serious.

EW   Hey.

A little crab is scuttling on the sand. You pick it up, avoiding its little pincers. Then, you throw it at his hair.

CT   YOU LITTLE -

You're already running by the time he stands up.