CT   SO.

CT   I HEARD YOU'RE JUMPING SHIP.

She starts, looking down from upon the watch tower. You're leaning on its legs as gently as you can, so you weren't able to make a sound. It must also be her concentration on... matters at hand.

UD   Where did you hear that?

CT   OL' CASPAR. WHO ELSE?

UD   Gods. When did you and him get so close?

UD   It feels like yesterday you were having those silly fights.

CT   IT TURNS OUT THAT HE'S A MAN OF PRINCIPLE.

CT   AND A MAN OF IMPECCABLE TASTE IN PIRATE-THEMED LITERATURE.

CT   I RESPECT BOTH OF THESE THINGS.

UD   Please don't enable him.

CT   DON'T GET ME WRONG.

CT   I'M NOT GOING TO SAIL OUT TO SEA LIKE A SWASH-BUCKLING *SSHOLE.

CT   THAT'S *HIS* PREROGATIVE. BUT IF ANYONE'S GOING TO DO IT...

CT   THAT MAN KNOWS HIS STUFF.

She groans, stands up, and makes her way down the ladder. You step aside as she hops down.

CT   SO?

CT   ARE WE TALKING ABOUT IT OR WHAT?

UD   Walk with me.

CT   WOW, IS IT *THAT* SERIOUS?

UD   I don't like talking from the tower. I'll get antsy.

UD   Besides - it's just patrol.

CT   FINE. WHATEVER.

CT   PATROL AWAY.

Some children with buckets and shovels, an adult with a kite, and a family approaching the water. Your eyes flicker from figure to figure, taking mental headcount with every glance. But you're mainly waiting for her to start talking.

UD   Don't you have any other outfit, by the way?

CT   LORD, HERE WE GO AGAIN.

UD   Oh, don't be dramatic.

UD   I'm just reminding you - ripped trunks is a dangerous game.

CT   AND IF I END UP *SS-UP ON THE SAND ONE OF THESE DAYS,

CT   YOU HAVE MY EXPRESS PERMISSION TO SKEWER ME.

UD   All I'm hearing is excuses.

UD   If I ever launch a beach line, I know who'd fit a dashing pair of swim shorts.

CT   BETTER IDEA - GET THAT LAKE BEAST OF YOURS.

CT   I'M SURE THE PEOPLE HAVE NEVER SEEN SOMETHING LIKE THAT BEFORE.

UD   I don't trust Champ around good fabric.

UD   And where I'm going, there will be fucking exquisite fabric.

CT   YEAH. I BET.

You don't know what to say after that. Neither of you do. So you focus on walking, on routine patrols. Like it's any other day out here.

If it wasn't for your red cap or her rescue tube, it would look like the two of you were strolling like any visitor, enamored by the sea. The thought makes you a little queasy.

UD   I'll visit.

When she finally speaks up again, it's forceful. Like she's trying to sound resolute. You laugh, for want of a better response.

CT   A TOURIST WHO CAN SWIM? WHAT A TREAT.

CT   REALLY. THAT'LL MAKE THIS ALL WORTH IT.

UD   Uu, stuff it.

She pushes your shoulder, making you sway a little.

UD   It's not like you of all people thought this would be permanent.

CT   YEAH, LIKE YOU DON'T MAKE IT F*CKING OBVIOUS.

CT   'HEY, CETO! DON'T YOU THINK THOSE SWIMSUITS COULD BE ZHUZHED UP?'

CT   'HEY, CETO! I'M GOING TO GO NETWORK WITH THOSE FANCY-LOOKING PEOPLE!'

CT   'HEY, CETO! DO YOU THINK AVRIL WOULD BE WILLING TO MODEL ONE DAY?'

CT   THE ANSWER IS NEVER, FOR THE RECORD.

CT   NO ONE SHOULD BE SUBJECTED TO HER STUMBLING DOWN THE RUNWAY.

UD   If I was bothering you, you could've just told me.

CT   AND IF A TOURIST WAS IN THE DESERT, THEY'D STILL FIND A WAY TO DROWN.

UD   ...

UD   What's your point?

CT   MY POINT IS THAT THERE'S NO WRANGLING THAT SEABIRD.

UD   Uu, you should have more faith in her!

UD   She has the looks. The figure. The charm.

CT   NOTE THAT YOU DIDN'T INCLUDE 'WORK ETHIC' OR 'PROFESSIONALISM'.

CT   EVERYTHING THAT'S LETTING YOU ESCAPE FROM HERE.

UD   I could...

The frown she wears is surprisingly sincere.

UD   If you want me to find you a position, I could -

CT   DON'T GIVE ME THAT SH*T.

CT   IT WOULDN'T HAPPEN. AND EVEN IF IT DID, I WOULDN'T TAKE IT.

UD   The more you talk like that,

UD   The more I think you're the only thing that's keeping you here.

CT   HA!

CT   SPOKEN LIKE A REAL PRIVILEGED BIG-SHOT F*CK. I KNEW YOU HAD IT IN YOU.

CT   THEY'LL LOVE YOU OVER THERE.

UD   You don't think I feel bad? Especially since we're already understaffed?

CT   YOU HAVE A TERRIBLE HABIT OF FEELING ALL SORTS OF WAYS.

CT   BUT DING-DONG, DEWDROP, GUESS WHAT?

CT   WHETHER YOU'RE HERE OR NOT, I'LL HAVE MY HANDS FULL.

CT   SO F*CK OFF AND FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS.

CT   NO ONE'S CLIMBING THE ILLUSTRIOUS SOCIAL LADDER OVER HERE.

CT   YOUR HIGHEST HIGH IS THAT D*MN TOWER, AND IT'S ONLY A FEW METERS UP.

UD   ...

UD   You know,

UD   For someone who doesn't care, you sound really bitter.

CT   CLEAN THE WATER OUT OF YOUR EARS, THEN.

CT   I'M A BEACON OF GODD*MN POSITIVITY.

CT   I'M *THRILLED* THAT YOU'RE FINALLY GETTING THE H*LL OUT OF HERE.

CT   SEND A MESSENGER PIGEON WHEN YOU MAKE IT BIG.

CT   I'LL SEND A SEAGULL. MAYBE IT'LL FIND A - F*CK!!

You curse as you step on a shell, the hard splinters digging into your feet. You pick up the shards in a mound of wet sand (no need for anyone else to get stabbed) and chuck it as far as you can to the ocean.

CT   PIECE OF SH*T CONCH.

UD   That was a whelk.

CT   YEAH, WELL, IT'S NOTHING BUT SCRAPS NOW.

CT   A WASTE OF A SHELL.

UD   ...

Before you can continue your careless and acerbic rambling, she suddenly grabs your hand.

UD   Ceto, I'm sorry.

Both of you stop. You stare at her with narrowed, incredulous eyes. Daring her to proceed after she pulled a stunt like that.

But she's always had a knack for pushing through your heated glares.

UD   I went into this hoping to be as emotionally detached as possible.

UD   Because I knew it was all temporary.

UD   But I did enjoy my time here. With you.

UD   Gods, it would've been downright unbearable if I didn't have you.

UD   I hope you all get more hands. I hope you'll never do this alone.

UD   I'm sorry.

UD   I really am.

You stand, motionless. Then, you scoff.

CT   I'M NOT A D*MN KID. YOU DON'T OWE ME YOUR COMPANY.

CT   AND YOU SURE AS H*LL DON'T OWE IT TO THEM.

CT   SO DON'T BE SORRY. YOU HAVE NOTHING TO BE SORRY FOR.

CT   GET THE H*LL OUT OF HERE, DESSIE.

You squeeze her hand, then roughly bat it away. You continue walking down the shore, resuming patrol. It doesn't matter to you whether she follows or not.

You hear her catching up to you a few seconds later. And you're indifferent to it. Obviously.